Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
soo... how was my night?
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
