your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize