So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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