id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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