I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
