I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
