I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
