yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
