U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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