My brain says no but my pants say off.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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