Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
