We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
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