C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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