So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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