does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
worst night to have a conscience
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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