I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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