I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Randomize
