I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Randomize
