She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
