I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
