She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
