go do what you do best...puke behind churches
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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