Tell her she can't have a vagina
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
