I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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