Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
