just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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