Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
