I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
