anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
