I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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