NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize