i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
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Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
We need a shit load of segways right now
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
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