I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Randomize
