well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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