I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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