There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
