What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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