yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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