Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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