i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize