And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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