Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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