haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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