i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
