My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
