I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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