i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
