Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
