plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize
