For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize