Im at strip club and am horny
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
How does it feel to date your dad?
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